The practise of vairagya is a form of stress management demonstrated in the life of Pramukh Swami Maharaj

We live by Newton’s third law of motion: For every action in nature there is an equal and opposite reaction. This law of physics is taught to us in high school, and accepted to be logical and ingrained from a young age. We learn to be outcome driven and solution or result orientated in whatever work we do. We work on the presumption that the fruits of our labour will make us happy. We become goal orientated and expect appropriate compensation and rewards for the products of our endeavours. The rewards we expect come in the form of fortune, fame, position, power or prestige.

We assume that acquiring a big house, luxury car and fashionable clothes will result in happiness. To achieve these rewards we work long hours, sacrificing family time and our health in the process. We prepare to be measured in our workplaces on KPIs (Key Performance Indicators) and other outcome driven tools. We run faster on the human hamster wheel by enduring tough working conditions, crazy deadlines and challenging bosses at an intensity that is unsustainable and impossible at times.

We live in a society that is completely outcome or result driven. From a young age we are wired to compare, compete and be better than the rest. We cajole, fight and manipulate in order to get a particular outcome. This leads to stress resulting in physical and mental illnesses. Medically, it is accepted that many illnesses are lifestyle driven as we chase the fruits of our endeavours in order to feel happy. Our mind sees no other way.

It’s not surprising therefore that we are seeing an increase in mental illnesses due to work stress. In 2019, the World Health Organization included burnout in the International Classification of Diseases. More and more people are succumbing to feeling that they cannot cope and cannot keep up. They feel pressured, overwhelmed and overburdened. No matter how hard they work, it never is good enough. As hard as they do work, there are only 24 hours in a day. In Japan, there is a word, ‘karoshi’, literally translated to mean ‘death by overwork’. The most common medical causes of karoshi deaths are heart attacks, strokes due to stress and suicide, all due to work related stress.

It is not only in our work that we chase results, but also within our family and communities. Of particular concern within families is the pressure we put on our children to achieve results, be it academically or in sports. It is becoming more common for doctors to treat children with high levels of anxiety due to the expectations their parents impose on them. Living up to parental expectations continues into adulthood; for example, choice of studies and career.

Yet we feel that if we achieve our goals, fame and fortune will set us free. We will thus become forever joyful and bask in prestige. Therefore, from a young age we spend our lives chasing goals, from school to university and then the workplace. We are also expected to deal with family and community expectations. It’s as if we are running on a hamster wheel that goes around in circles. The wheel turns and we hope it will deliver the results we want. We get caught up in a never-ending loop. We try to step off by running faster, so that we achieve our end goal. However, we all end up exhausted within the wheel.

Today’s modern and materialistic society, driven by a winner takes all attitude, brainwashes us into believing that the more we have, the happier we will be. Tons of books, courses and seminars are written on how to achieve our goals and ensure that we get the outcome we desire. Social media drives this insatiable appetite of chasing fame and fortune: the more likes and followers we have, the more we are expected to be happier. We seek constant appreciation to acknowledge we’ve arrived.

However, not all are guaranteed of a success story. We learn early in life that in spite of all our actions, we do not get the reaction or result we desire. Despite hard work and effort, we do not achieve the fruits of our labour. For every one success story we hear of, there are a thousand shattered dreams and disappointments. We become slaves to the system and wonder why we cannot break free.

When people are generally asked, what is it they fear the most. The answer inevitably is failure. From the day we start school, it is ingrained that failure is unacceptable. We feel we have failed when we don’t accomplish the goals that society, family or we expect. We become stressed due to the pressure we impose on ourselves. One definition of stress is the gap between reality and our expectations. We interpret this gap as failure.

Invariably, frustration sets in. We feel incomplete and unfulfilled. We don’t know what to do or where to turn. It’s not surprising that we are seeing an increase in mental illness as a result. Stress results in an increase in mood disorders such as burnout, depression and anxiety. We sacrifice who we are and it is no surprise that our values are thrown aside on our path to worldly success. We begin to accept that the end result is more important than the path we take to get there.